Throwback Thursday #9: Some Progress

Throwback Thursdays feature relevant posts (of about 20) from a private, online journal I kept last fall. They chronicle my time during a depressive episode, which led to another round of  ECT. You’ll read firsthand what that was like for me. The entries are slightly edited for clarity, and with regard to anonymity.

shower-water-wet-bathroom-stream-wash-pouringSome Progress – November 1, 2016

I finally showered today, albeit with some shortcuts: I used the leave-in instead of my regular conditioner so I wouldn’t have to deal with product and blow-drying. I also didn’t do my skincare routine other than rub lotion on my face. I used body lotion, though. Wearing sweats.

And the reason I showered was because there was ECT electrode gel dried up in the hair at my temples and no amount of combing could get it out. I guess I don’t want them to see it when I go back tomorrow. I don’t know that it would matter because I’m obviously depressed, but I guess I still take a little pride in my appearance.

Woke up earlier (6:00 – 6:15 AM) than I have been (7:30ish or later) and had no trouble getting out of bed. I even fed the dog and kitties, which I haven’t done in a week, at least. My husband didn’t realize this and fed them again haha. I bet they were happy.

I’ve gained 5 lbs. in the last two weeks, which I am not at all happy about. I guess it was because of the strong sugar cravings I’d been having.

I thought I might be able to walk Rudy today, but then thought that would be pushing it so he’s at daycare.

Oh, well. Things can only get better. And yet I still feel so depressed. My husband says one ECT treatment and a shower won’t end the depression, that it will take more ECTs. He’s right, I’m sure.

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