The silhouette of anxiety, and its baggage, is superimposed onto my life. It keeps me from doing many things, especially new endeavors like going to a yoga or kickboxing class. It keeps me from taking the train to get to a class. Or to leave the house alone. It keeps me from going to things I want to go to and with which I’m familiar, like the hockey game last Saturday, and it definitely makes me terrified of meeting new people.
On Sunday, I made reservations for later in the week, at a pub I’d never been to, in order to see a high school friend perform an acoustic show. Going to unfamiliar places makes me anxious. I also haven’t been to a concert in decades; some types of crowds (another story) make me anxious, and I didn’t know what to expect. Luckily, the woman I spoke with said she could seat us at a table near the stage, and the fact that I could make reservations and not have to fight for a place to see the show was a relief.
I promised my friend that I’d be there, and I didn’t want to go back on my word. I felt a little anxious, but at least I would be seeing someone I already knew rather than meeting a stranger, even if it was at a venue I’d never been to.
Near the time my husband and I had to leave, I was surprised that I didn’t feel like cancelling — and I didn’t — woot woot! Anxiety’s silhouette vanished, at least for last night. Unlike Saturday’s outing, I was able to take a shower and dress myself. I got a manicure and a haircut the day before, so I felt pretty good. I wore “real” clothes, not sweats, an oversized t-shirt, a hoodie, and gym shoes, which has been my fashion choice of late — as in the last several years.
My friend’s show rocked, and it was great to see him, especially since we hadn’t seen each other since graduation — in 1987! My husband and I had a lot of fun. We couldn’t even remember the last “date night” we had, which often consists of trying new restaurants. I’m glad I beat anxiety last night!
Is the silhouette of anxiety superimposed onto your life? How do you make it disappear, at least for a little while?
Post inspired by Daily Prompt: Silhouette
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