So it’s been a year since they switched my meds. And I’ve been doing really well–thriving. Don’t get me wrong–once in a while when I’m just sitting there, this thought comes out of nowhere: “I’m so depressed.” I was so used to being depressed that I couldn’t recognize other feelings. The feeling of being not depressed is new to me. I’m not used to it!
So what does being not depressed feel like? For me, there are a number of ways. I feel lighter, less of a weight on my shoulders; I don’t feel like I’m under a cloud all the time even when it’s sunny; I care more about my appearance–I’ve started wearing a little bit of makeup again; I’m not always wearing “house clothes,” like sweats and an old shirt; and probably most important is that I’ve regained some of my self-confidence.
These changes didn’t come about overnight. Rather, they happened gradually, which is probably why I’m only now discovering them.
How do you feel when you’re not depressed?