The other day I posted 3 Things to Do More Often. Today I’ll examine Things to Do Less Often.
- APOLOGIZE: I say “I’m sorry” waaaayyyy more than I ought to, and about inconsequential things. For example, if my husband and I reach for the same item at the same time, I’ll apologize. In the car, if I don’t secure my seatbelt fast enough, the obnoxious alarm goes off, and I apologize. Out in public, if someone brushes against me and says, “Excuse me,” I apologize (and try to get over the fact that a complete stranger touched me). Well, none of these things or others like them are my fault, so why do I keep apologizing? I’m guessing it has to do with my self-esteem: it’s low. I think so little of myself that I’m willing to take the blame or claim that whatever the situation is, is my fault. I need to do this less often.
- PRESSURE MYSELF: I have a habit of pressuring myself to post once a day here or to my dog’s Instagram (shameless plug — follow him here! @rudy_thegoodboy). I’ll have 5 posts ready to publish in the next 5 days, but I feel that I need to write yet one more. The thought of not posting for one day makes me uneasy. Rationally, I know that I don’t have to do any of this, but in my mind it gets warped into some sort of hang-up. Not fun. I will stop pressuring myself more often.
- AVOIDANCE: I’m a HUGE avoider. I avoid actions/interactions because I’m scared of them. I can’t even pay for something at the check-out line without feeling anxious; I’ll step aside so my husband can pay, but he’s on to me now. I avoid answering the door when we order food and delivery arrives. The restaurants don’t always give you the total, so you only learn what it is when delivery shows up, and then I’m confused about how much to tip because I can’t do math that quickly. Plus it’s a total stranger, and you never know. I need to stop avoiding things and people.
These are just some of the habits in my life that I want to stop: apologizing needlessly; putting pressure on myself; and avoiding everyday things.
Is there anything you need to do less often?