Depression & Indecision

yes-3100993_640When I’m depressed, I wouldn’t be able to decide between toast or a bagel for breakfast. And when I’m not depressed, I still can’t. Often, I turn to my husband and ask him if I should do the one thing or the other, hoping that he will decide for me. This rarely works because he rarely tells me which choice to go with! Well, sometimes he does.

What do you think of this outfit? I ask. My husband replies, “Wear what you feel comfortable in.” Or, the red scarf or the darker red scarf? And he says, “Darker red,” when in actuality, I had already made up my mind to wear the regular red one and didn’t need his opinion after all! I only gave these examples from when I’m not depressed, because when I’m depressed, I’m not going anywhere, anyway, so who cares what I’m wearing!

I don’t know how to just choose. Instead, it’s a big production that usually ends up with me making the final decision, anyway. And then my husband throws up his arms and says, “Then why did you ask, if you’re going to go with the opposite choice from what I picked out?”

This behavior on my part must be annoying. The problem is, I have no idea how to stop. Maybe I can Google “how to overcome indecision”? Maybe it’s behavior that migrated from my depressive state and into my baseline state and has become a habit? No clue.


Do you make decisions easily, or do you have a difficult time? Does it become harder when you’re depressed?

Author:

I hold an MFA in poetry from The Ohio State University. I'm a fiction writer, blogger, wife, pet mom, and Ohio State Buckeye!

20 thoughts on “Depression & Indecision

  1. Depression definitely makes decisions hard. I do better when I make them ahead of time. I find it much easier to make decisions when putting together my grocery list; if I was to leave decisions until I got to the store, I’d probably walk out empty-handed.

    1. Making decisions ahead of time—great idea! Although knowing me, I’d probably still change my mind lol! Thank you for sharing 😊

  2. I am a horrible decision maker. We have a running joke, that I need to pick out at least 3 outfits to choose from, because well, that is exactly what happens. I change, change, and change again. Food? Well, I start looking through menus for date night, that Monday (date night is every other friday) I decide I want to go somewhere on Monday, and then I change my mind on Wednesday, and then Friday I change my mind again, unless I am really hankering for something particular. These are my methods. And I know things happen this way. Prior to finding my “method”, I was a hot mess. It would take me forever to pick something at a restaurant, or pick out an outfit, or even decide what I am making for dinner for the night. I’m not sure where it stems from, if it is a depressive trait or not. I do know, that it is annoying as hell, and for once, I wish I could make up my mind like a rational person.

    1. If we’re going to a restaurant, I check the menu online and decide what I’m having then. Very convenient lol! I understand how you feel about this. Thanks for sharing.

  3. This is so relatable! I’ll end up spending an inordinate amount of time selecting between shampoos or soaps, or anything. Yes, it makes indecision very hard! Hmm I still have a lot of indecision, but I agree with deciding on something ahead of time and then just doing it kind of on autopilot so you don’t have time to second guess. Then again, I’m still in progress. That’s probably why I just buy the same exact thing over and over- to avoid the decision making! Lol

  4. I read this and instantly thought of my decision making of what to wear just yesterday. (I was only going to the supermarket for a little bit) However, it took me nearly an hour to figure out what to wear. As soon as we got home, I changed back into my PJ’s.
    I find making decisions when I’m depressed so much harder than when I’m not. I had a couple of days of feeling pretty good, and they went “Poof”, gone again. I honestly feel crippled from my thoughts being scattered, and concentration nil.
    I couldn’t decide what to eat for dinner last night, so I just plain didn’t eat.
    LOL! I have so many errands to run later, I wonder how long it will take this time to decide what to wear. It’s quite frustrating.
    So, by reading this… You sound as if the depression bug has truly got its grip on you again. I’m so sorry to hear this.
    I see my therapist for the first time since the beginning of May, next week. This once every other month visit is serving no purpose whatsoever. Yet, I simply can’t afford to see her once a month. So much for having health insurance if you can’t afford to even use it.

    1. I’m sorry your few good days have disappeared, and I hope they’ll be back soon. You have to eat lol! But I totally get what you’re saying about it being more difficult to make decisions when depressed. I think I do have the bug, but I keep telling myself that it’s only a 24-hr bug lol!! 🤗

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